Life happens and sometimes that makes mommies sad.
Kids are amazing little emotion gauges; they can read their mommies better than most.
When my kids were young, my father was very ill, and his life was hanging in the balance. Sometimes it was hard to keep that emotion bottled up in front of my kids. They would see the smile but look into my eyes and say, “Mommy, why are you sad?” And, I was not just sad; at times, I was irritable, despondent, and angry.
Mommies get sad. Dozens of life events can cause sadness, anger, despondency and guilt. Not all moms (or dads) are equipped to handle the emotional rollercoaster that comes with situations beyond their control. Some “mommies” seem to handle it better than others; some mommies can’t deal with problems well and some just won’t.
In a recent article, “Mommy, Where Do Daddies Come From?” we looked at the gamut of where dads are in the life of a child. Moms hold a special place as well and yet there are times, just like dads, when they can’t or won’t be their best.
Statistically speaking, moms aren’t as apt to physically leave as dads are, they tend to leave emotionally or withhold love when things get tough. One is not better than the others; there is still a profound impact on the children. Sometimes, the reason appears to be purely selfish, leaving dads to pick up the pieces: ignoring her kids while she watches T.V., taking a job in another city, or having an affair. But we don’t know all the facts.
What we do know is that moms have struggles; they are human. How they handle the ups and downs of life will be determined by a number of factors – no two are alike.
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”
It’s easy to make assumptions about why a mom won’t get help or why she left her children, and there are always two sides of the coin.
Instead of jumping to any conclusions, we can, as a body of believers, offer to help in ways that honor God. Whether a temporary setback or a blatant disregard for her family, we can stand in the gap for moms that can’t or won’t be there for their kids.
Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.
For the most part, both moms and dads love and care for their children. When moms are having a tough time, dads will step in and do what they can to comfort the children and take over for mom. If the need is too great, the community should be willing to help for a time.
Listen to my cry, for I am in desperate need; rescue me from those who pursue me, for they are too strong for me.
Unless there is evidence of abuse or neglect that should not be condoned or ignored, we can extend grace and compassion in a way that lifts up the family and supports both the mom and the dad in a time of need.
If a mom is going through a season of despair, we can wrap our “Jesus arms” around her, her husband and her children to restore them to hope. We can be the messenger of joy and hope. We have an all knowing, all loving God that cares deeply for each of us. We can be the support and encouragement to both the husband and the wife and show the children what a community of believers looks like in a time of need.
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